Erotic story about serial rapists

Now, it feels like the time is ripe for the story to come out. I suffered a detachment from the story because of the narrative voice. Unfortunately, he made the mistake of raping a professional, educated woman in New York City in They took me in, and the official victim services woman, Lupita, came. Add to these problems the clunky dialogue--at one point, for example, the villain goes on for pages about his experiences in prison, in language that's far more erudite and self-conscious than suits the character--and the utterly flat ending, and you have a book that doesn't work on any level. Am I reading too much into it all?

Their own minds were murky. Filed to: Rape. Reporter Josh White describes Thomas as the platonic ideal of the "stranger rapist" — he writes that his crimes "gripped the region with the kind of fear that comes from an unknown man, lurking in the darkness, attacking strangers who were doing such everyday tasks as walking home from work, waiting for a bus, moving out of an apartment or even sleeping in their own bed.